Bangkok Bangschmok

Well, we made it. 24 hours later.

Our plane was amazing. Never seen anything like it. A screen. In front of your seat! This must be some new fancy technology. We had a nine hour flight to Mumbai which consisted of watching their inflight movies The Godfather and Shrek. They fed us three times and drinks were free. Their apple teenie was a little light on the teenie. Having only travelled by Easyjet, we never knew such luxury. The free pillow, I assume it was free, I took it, was the icing on an Indian cake.

Noony didn’t fair so well. The person behind used the touch screen on her seat as a punching bag, he also sang loudly over his iPod, pinched girls’ bums as they walked past and was walking about when the plane was landing. To stop our middle class anger spilling over into loud tutting, we had to assume he was a special, but he wasn’t. He was a plonker*.

Mumbai airport, however, was awful. Army villains everywhere. They made me wait for 20 minutes whilst my bag was being prepped for searching. Turns out I wasn’t allowed life saving water I bought at heathrow. The lighter and hunting knife were fine.

When we arrived at Bangkok there was a very patient taxi driver, (we were an hour late) who took us in his suped up pink toyota with a 200 litre nitrous tank in the boot. Vroom!

Bangkok is everything we thought it would be. Hectic, smelly, smog ridden but friendly. Going to sleep now but tomorrow we are going shopping in Siam Square, Noony doesn’t know it but I want a Thai bride. Just for cleaning and looking good on my other arm. I shall call her Hong Mei, which local people tell me roughly translates as Jean.

Too tired to ‘hilariously’ comment on events properly, but just can’t believe we are here for over five months. Probably won’t write this much for a post again, because to be honest if you’ve got this far, you are one of few. Silly pictures and overt lies are the way forward for now.


*think worse

Location:ถนนพระราม 4,Rong Mueang,Thailand

4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Deb
    Oct 19, 2010 @ 23:14:53

    glad you arrived safely – sounds like an interesting journey! look forward to hearing about our Thailand travels x


  2. Deb
    Oct 19, 2010 @ 23:16:03

    no I’m not in Thailand! I mean YOUR Thailand travels 🙂


  3. Paddington
    Oct 20, 2010 @ 14:26:33

    I’ll have a Thai bride too if they’re going please. I shall call her Thundercat.


  4. William Moss
    Oct 21, 2010 @ 05:53:26

    so glad you arrived safe. again im sorry i couldnt meet you in bangkers, but weekend after next would be splendid. ill also send you the number of a friend of mine there that will be help you in the event of an emergency (check your personal mails).

    planes are now quote/unquote ‘mental’. commercialflightequette now allows that touchscreen-headaches are serious grounds for a vengeful downtrending headrest to the ribs of the offending party. with all the eastern serenity, high pressure oxygen, and hopelessly coiffeured indifference that surrounds the air hosts/esses, your revenge shall go unpunished. and justly so. inconsiderate c**ts. dont they know youre trying to get away from all that nonsense?

    also BEWARE OF ANYONE SELLING GEMS/RUBIES/DIAMONDS or anything else that villains of Famous Five yarns might dream of finding off the cornish coast. 19th Fagin-esque scams still provide approximately 23% of vagrant and Tuk-Tuk driver income in Bangkok. I recommend either a forceful ‘NO, SIR!’ – or else a healthy drenching of Mace – to deter the would-be bamboozler.

    see you soon guys!!!!!



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